Thursday, November 7, 2013


You visited me in my dreams. Whether or not it's really you... I don't care. I still feel like I got to be with you.

I haven't seen you in my dreams in months... for a really long time. I prayed and asked God for a Jovi dream and guess what? I saw you that very night.

We were all on vacation... swimming in a pool. I felt really torn between you and Lila. I couldn't get to you... but you just kept throwing up. You looked so, so sick. You were weak and would just lay around while Cash swam and swam. I finally was able to pick you up. It felt so good to hold you. To snuggle your sweet body. You smiled at me. You knew who I was and I knew you. Every time I see you in my dreams, I am mesmerized by you. I could stare at you all day. I held you and hugged you for the longest time. I know you knew... and I know you felt loved. There's something about us... I knew you the minute I saw you when you were born and since you've passed and I get a Jovi visit in my dreams... it's the same. We just know each other. The bond is still there. I held you and enjoyed every second. But, you were sick. I could tell being with us was hard on you and just not right. So, I gave you one last tight squeeze and set you down... and you just drifted off... and were gone. As if I knew you were better off where you are now... in Heaven. While many would think dreams would be hard, (they are) but they are better than nothing at all. I cherish the few minutes I got with you even if I had to wake up only to realize they weren't true or you were still in Heaven and I still on Earth... having who knows what in between us. I still love to see you.

I've often wondered if you would have lived a really hard life if she had stayed... Did God bring you home early because you would have lived a tragic, hard, or painful life here if you got to live longer? Were you taken early because that was the best for all of us?

I know our reunion in Heaven is going to only be a fraction of what it is here. But, you always know who I am when I see you in my dreams. And I know you will know when I get to Heaven. I can't even begin to imagine what it will be like to hold you for eternity... never being afraid of waking up and realizing it isn't real. Thank you for the snuggles, baby. I loved every minute. I love you so much... to Heaven and back.

"Forever could never be long enough for me to feel like I've  had long enough with you." Train